1.02.2008

Vocational Rehab

I'm not a good cog in the machine, and never have been. I work best, alone. When I know what needs to be done, and have a clear idea how to get it done, I run with it. I never needed anybody standing over me. Re: carrots & stick motivators--I don't respond to "the stick." I'm more likely to turn around and bite the person waving the stick at me.

I don't get motivated by other people's "carrots," either.
Cucumbers, or tomatoes, maybe. Lettuce or any greens, definitely. Watermelon's always good.

I don't like office politics, aka "gossip." I don't like to be around people who are always running other people down. This week it's her, next week it's him. Guess what: you're next. Gossip doesn't interest me, and never has. It's a diversion from reality--like celebrity "news" coverage.

Tedious, repetitive jobs bore me. I'm not a robot. When I walked into the workplace, I didn't check my mind at the gate. Why would anyone expect that?

Chronic complaining about the job, the pay, etc. bores me. Either do something to change the conditions you complain about, or actively seek another way to make a living, such as:

Sell flowers. Invent Gatorade. Scoop dog poop. (Somebody in Florida actually started a business doing this.)

I respect people who have the guts to try to organize for better working conditions for all.

I despise cowards who rat out co workers--who have done nothing illegal-- to score themselves some points with the boss. News flash, rats: it backfires on you. Bosses also form unions--they're called chambers of commerce. Stand up bosses don't like backstabbers, no matters whose back's the target.

I abhor phoneys who only work when the boss is watching, leaving honest workers with a heavier workload. Those same people pick and choose their tasks, leaving the dirty work and the heavy work to real workers.

I respect people who recognize their own limitations and are fearless enough to verbalize them, knowing they'll probably be discriminated against as a result of their honesty. You should, too.

Vocational Assessment: Based on the foregoing, the only work I'm suited for is:
short term and part-time...

1. informational picketer
2. bullhorn operator
3. dog walker
4. cat caretaker
5. tea party attendee : the kind where you drink tea outa little plastic teacups.
6. home based blog writer
7. light housekeeper
8. small scale organic gardener
9. agitator
10.small space organizer

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